That moment when your kids flips the script.
Me: “I said GO…TO…BED!!)
(big boom…crash…giggle giggle…feet scatter)
(Enter daddy…catches Bubby 2 writing in his notebook)
Me: “Didn’t I say go to bed?”
Bubby 2: “But I was writing a story…”
Me: “But I said…”
Bubby 2: “It’s about you and God…”
Me: (silence…deep inhale…and…speechless…but then….)
That moment when you realize it’s a thermometer on the counter and not a pregnancy test.
I don’t get it…bedtime is the same time every night. So why must it be a parade through the swamps of sadness every time I say it’s time to go to bed?
I mean it’s just down right dramatic! AND I GAVE YAL EXTRA TIME!!!
That moment when your kids take you to the limit and you try to stay calm…
Me: “We are NOT going to the beach today. It’s too darn HOT!”
Bubby-1: “Daddy my fish just died…”
(Other Bubbies and Sweets gather)
(Enter tears and sad background music)
Me: “Kids, put your shoes on…”
Sweets: “Are we going to the BEACH?!”
ME: (resentful nod)
Bubbies and Sweets: “Yaaaaaayyy!”
Yes, school has been out for a while now and things tend to get pretty loud around these parts. Bubby-1, Bubby-2, Bubby-3, and Sweets have some days where they make the noise unbearable. Today was one of those days and I borrowed a line from Key and Peele while calmly saying, “You’re hurting………….my ear drums…” Ironically, my kids looked at me like I was crazy and it got very quiet afterwords…
That moment when you can’t take it anymore as a parent… Ok, I would never do this in front of my kids, but the 30 second clip (wait for it…) below is a small snippet of what I felt like doing after hearing this madness for about an hour (yes, so let this clip soak in and then imagine the time multiplied by 120!). And yeah the kids found a way to filter this repeated insanity out while I slowly was dragged into the depths of mania…”OMG!!! Would someone please turn off that TOY!!!!??? No one else HEARS THAT?!?!?!”